Helen chalmers, Still in pain

From: Kath Findlay (klfindlay@yahoo.co.uk)
Sun Oct 15 18:33:35 2000


Dear Helen, I have just read your letter which was re posted by Helen Dynda, and hope that you are indeed on the road to recovery. You say that you still have some pain, but don't attribute it to your adhesions. My question is how can you be sure? The reason I ask this question is that I have had several separations of my adhesions and after I had it done the first time I still had a decree of pain afterwards. I had an ovarian cyst removed at the same time and the doctors told me this was more likely to be causing the pain. They said that they had removed all the adhesions and I shouldn't feel any more pain from this. I would like to say at this point that the pain was not as bad as before, sometimes it depended on what I was doing. After three months, a trip to the psychiatrist and a bone scan, I managed to convince the doctors that I was still in pain so they eventually agreed to give me a laperotomy to see if perhaps I had another cyst. They were adamant that the Adhesions would not be the culprit. After the exploratory op they came with their tails between their legs and apologised to me . They told me that the whole of my left side was one large mass. my adhesions had returned.

One week later I had my next op. It was new micro laser surgery. It took the pain away instantly but it returned within three months worse than ever. I was then told that a hysterectomy was the only option left to cure my adhesions. I had the hysterectomy and I was cured. I had 4 glorious years. I ran my Guest House. I did 9 learning modules that entailed 32 exams. I was chairman of a marketing group. I was a workaholic, I loved life and the last thing on my mind was Adhesions.

I woke up one morning and the dreaded pain was back. It took a year to convince them again, where the pain was coming from. After a visit to the psychiatrist again and yet another bone scan. Adhesions shouldn't give you this kind of pain, it must be something else. After the surgery the doctor visits my bed with a big smile on his face like he's just struck gold. You wont believe what we found. ( Yes I will, I have been trying to tell you for years.) We found that your Bowel was wrapped around your ovary and your bowel, bladder, appendix, well everything actually were all stuck together. I didn't Know whether to laugh or cry. I could not be mad at this man who had just taken all my pain away. Indeed once again I was cured instantly pain free and after a few weeks of the heeby geebies.( coming down from the pain medication) I was once again swinging from the chandeliers. I was definitely cured this time not an ounce of pain.

I carried on with my Guest House. I started up an Au-pair agency, Built up and directed, another marketing group throughout the country and went to lots of meetings. Once again my life was worth living and yes I was complacent. Once again, Adhesions were the last thing on my mind. Did I speak too soon? where was this pain coming from. it wasn't even 3 years since the last op. I carried on suffering in silence for a while ( maybe it will eventually fade away as quick as it came. ) No! but surly this time I wont have to go for a bone scan. Oh yes you will ! I wont have to go and see a psychiatrist again. Surly not after the third time right, about where the pain was coming from before. Sorry Adhesions don't cause that type of pain in fact we're not sure they cause pain at all. ( It does, it does, Honest it does.) It must be in your head. We have an appointment for you to see a psychiatrist. We think woman sit at home with nothing to do but invent pain. ( are we crazy, or are they crazy.) ( please say them ) Wrong! We are the crazy ones for putting up with all this.

When I eventually convinced them that I was in agony, it was real pain, not in my head, and my bones were perfect, They couldn't find a surgeon willing to take the risk of operating. They eventually found a bladder surgeon who said he would do it. He advised me to have my remaining ovary removed and to cut down on the Hormone R Therapy, saying that it would aggravate my adhesions. Why had none of the Gynie Docs ever suggested this before. Although I didn't wish to go into premature menopause, I agreed. I will do anything, just take the pain away. By this time ( one year after going back to the doc, to tell him my pain was back ) I was just about climbing the walls. The night before my surgery, I slept like a log. Yes I was quite complacent. ( again, you say. I am afraid so. ) Tomorrow it will all be over. No more pain. Back to leading a normal life with my family again.

I have, had this surgery several times before and each time the pain had gone instantly. Yes I had a little pain from the surgery, but that would go in a few weeks, it always did. Except this time it didn't. It was mild at first and I couldn't make up my mind if it was the surgery or the dreaded adhesions. Some days were better than others and after a month I had to come to terms with the reality of my life. It was here to stay, this time.

I was told that I couldn't go on having operations for my adhesions. That each time I was doing more damage to my body. Its been 2 years since my last op, which means three years in pain. No more swinging from the chandeliers. I spend each day on the couch with my lap top, I write books and sometimes I paint. I am classed as severely disabled. I can only go out in a wheelchair. I have not only ruined my life but I have ruined my husbands life too. We had to sell our home and he has had to give up his career, to look after me. And the ironic thing is it probably could have been avoided if only I hadn't been so trusting and believed everything that the docs told me. If only I had asked more questions. If only I had taken charge of my own body.

I am sorry that this is so long, I don't wish to bore you all, but if I can stop some of you from making the same mistakes as I have, then its worth it.

Helen I don't know how long it is since you had your surgery, but I will pray that the pain you still have is from your wound and not your Adhesions.

Best Wishes to you. Hope the pain goes away soon. Kate.


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