Hi Marianne - empowerment and questions

From: Lgapmon@aol.com
Thu Jul 5 10:28:39 2001


Hi Marianne --

So glad you were able to go to the bathroom! Yes, you are on the road to recovery. Hang in there, good things will happen to you (and to all of us <G>) soon!

You wrote:

<< I find it very hard to not be bitter towards any woman who can jump around, be active. I feel jealous. I get so bitter with anyone who makes me feel that they do not care, that I've wished the similiar to happen to them. How unhealthy is this for me? I realize I have to accept this as part of my life and am tryng to put the bitterness behind me. Though, I keep it inside, and don't express these feelings out loud. I know it's eating me up inside.>>

Your question was, how unhealthy is this for you -- the answer is, very. :(

When one is in pain, sick and bitter, it is easy to wind up in a "spiral of negativity." These negative thoughts weigh you down and reproduce exponentially. It's soooo hard to break the cycle. But the good new is, it can be broken!! HOW? By being empowered and ASKING THE RIGHT QUESTIONS.

Here is an excerpt from a paper I wrote for a class this spring -- it was about Empowerment. I hope this helps make sense out of what I am trying to say:

~~~~~ One facet of empowerment is the freedom to question. (Anthony) Robbins places great stock in questions – he feels that "learning to ask empowered questions in moments of crisis is a critical skill" (Awaken the Giant Within, p. 187). He relates an incident in which he attended a seminar given by a former associate. This associate used Robbins’ material verbatim, and claimed credit for having developed it. Robbins first reaction was, "How dare he! How could he have the nerve to do this?" (p. 187). This question and others like it were unanswerable, and would have put Robbins into an infinite loop of negativity (p. 187). Robbins realized this, so he started trying to change his state by directing his energy into a different line of questioning. "What do I respect about this guy?" he asked himself. "Nothing!" his brain screamed at him. Then, he asked himself, "What could I respect about him if I wanted to?" Finally, the answer that came to him was this, "…he’s not sitting around passively; at least he’s using what I taught him!" This made Robbins laugh and enabled him to change his state, breaking the downward spiral of negativity that would have followed the original line of questioning (p. 187). On freedom, (Kahlil) Gibran wrote, "thus your freedom when it loses its fetters becomes itself the fetter of a greater freedom" (The Prohpet, p. 49). Being free to ask questions, and knowing which questions to ask, enhances empowerment. ~~~~~

If you can find just one question that helps you change your state, you will empower yourself to let go of the bitterness. Then you will start to feel soooo much better, and your body will heal more completely, too. Some questions (why me?) have no answers, no solutions...these give no peace. Find those that have answers and you will find peace. :D

Helen Dynda has some great information on the Mind-Body connection -- it's all true, the mind and the body feed off of each other. It's vital to have the right attitude so your body can feel better.

Of course it isn't easy, but....this is the rest of our lives we are talking about. Well worth some effort!!! :D (And to think I used to be SUCH a cynic!)

"Dare to be empowered, to dream big and live larger-than-life." (me <G>)

Feel better soon, we are here for you!! May everyone have a super, pain-free day!!!!

Love,

Lynda M. in AZ

"It is only with the heart that one can see rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye." - Antoine de Saint-Exupery


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