And manners begin at home. Perhaps you could read up on Miss Manners, who is always informing people on how to tell others to mind their own business nicely. She also reminds them that good manners are especially important in families, as our loved ones come first in our lives.
Ssorry to run on so, Take care, and keep on being yourself with your head held up high. You have no choice really, so you might as well act with pride. And if you need pain medication, take it. That's what it is there for. Please don't suffer needlessly. Love, Sally
J&L VERMEY wrote:
> Dear Helen Dynda
>
> I was very pleased to read the information you provided on the subject of
> addiction verses tolerance.
>
> My parents have all BUT accused me of being a "druggy" because I am taking
> methadone (which I am slowly coming off from) and now Sevredol (Morphine
> Sulphate) upon the suggestions of my GP.
>
> They're off the opinion that I am weak, and that I should just pull myself
> together, that hardly anyone in our family has ever been sick.
>
> They refuse to believe that I have a bowel disease, let alone adhesions.
> They say that it is my own fault that I became sick, that I haven't been
> eating a suitable diet, etc, etc.
>
> I am so sick of their attitude, therefore I forwarded the information you
> provided, to my parents, in the hope of reaching some kind of understanding.
> Although I fear that I will never get it.
>
> I think they are disappointed in me because I am not 'PERFECT', like their
> other two daughters. I feel like they are ashamed of me, as they have never
> even told their closest friends about my health problems, nor do they ever
> want me to discuss my health with anyone.
>
> My mother is always criticising me, because I wear 'sloppy clothing' (her
> opinion) - she often gives me clothes - which I hate - for they are tight
> and uncomfortable, and when she sees that I do not wear them, she tells me
> off no end. I've tried to tell her that I am 31 years old, that I am married
> and that I'm quite capable of choosing my own clothing - and that because I
> suffer from chronic pain day in day out that I prefer to wear comfortable,
> loose fitting clothes.
>
> I feel so much hurt and disappointment in my parents, why can't they just
> support me? Why can't they accept that I need to eat a low fibre / low
> residue diet? Why do they keep disagreeing with the advice my doctors give
> me? When we are invited for dinner my mother never provides food suitable
> for me to eat.
>
> Sometimes I think that I'd be better off if I had nothing more to do with my
> parents, but on the other hand, I don't want to divorce them from my life,
> as that has happened to my father and his family, his brothers haven't
> spoken to him for over 26 years - all because of a stupid misunderstanding,
> and one of his brothers has not spoken to my grandparents for those same
> amount of years - now my grandparents are dying (they are in their late
> 80's) and no one knows where that brother lives, so they haven't even been
> able to inform him of that fact!
>
> Hurt and disappointed,
>
> Lin (from NZ)
>