Re: purpose of the board!

From: MICHAEL MURRAY (mkmurray30@msn.com)
Wed Jul 30 00:53:42 2003


WELL SAID JEAN!
Kelly

>From: creative@enter.net (Jean (from PA))
>Reply-To: adhesions@adhesions.org
>To: Multiple recipients of list ADHESIONS
>Subject: purpose of the board!
>Date: Tue, 29 Jul 2003 22:46:33 -0500
>
>I don't post on the board anymore due to the fights, pushiness and
>confrontations but I must state my thoughts and opinions now.
>I have however been on here for over 3 years and have seen and heard
>allot.
>I have probably been more observant than most because I have learned I
>must look out for myself.
>I will be as happy as the next person if and when there is a mircale
>cure, but I also will have very carefully done my home-work!
>
>I am one who came here long ago for support and to learn, however I
>never really received that "because" I did not and could not afford to
>go to the doctors people on the board prefered.
>In spite of this I still helped people with allot of ARD matters and
>computer help when I was asked.
>"That" is what this board is suppose to be all about....helping each
>other, even if it is just showing compassion and an ear to listen.
>
>I did make some friends on here, which I am glad for(and some
>enemies),and they have for the most part been there for me in private
>email.
>
>Just to make it clear...I "am not" involved in any way with the stuff
>that is going on again.
>I was not even aware of any of these private emails and also missed
>allot of the posts.
>I do not care where "anyone" goes for surgery or who likes or dislikes
>what doctor.
>I just wish the best for everyone!
>They do have the right to brag if they are happy with their doctor, no
>matter who it is, but do not have the right to be pushy and demanding
>about where people should or must go.
>No-one should be made to feel they are not wanted and alone because they
>choose not to go somewhere for whatever reason.
>
>This stuff is not new on the board at all and has gone on from the very
>beginning.
>"Everyone" should have the right to choose the doctor he/she prefers
>whether others agree or not, and that should not hamper them in any way
>from receiving the support they deserve.
>No-one should be made to feel they need to be part of a "clique" to fit
>in.
>They definitely should not be afraid to speak the truth or ashamed if
>they do....and it does happen all the time whether anyone admits it or
>not.
>This is ridiculous and not humanitarian or helping anyone!!!
>People need the "truth" to make well-informed decisions.
>
>I have seen allot of people ridiculed for their decisions and/or words,
>and I certainly don't think that is what this board was intended for!
>It is their given right!!
>I for one was made to feel like I was a terrible person because I
>thought more about the money and did not choose to go bankrupt by going
>to some of the chosen doctors in the past. I did not choose to be
>bankrupt and a good chance of still being in pain, only creating "more"
>problems.
>I was told money should not be a consideration when your health is
>concerned and yet people "do" need food in their mouths and a roof over
>their heads too!
>
>Some people, probably just simply cannot afford to pay for their own
>surgery and that is why most people have insurance in the US to begin
>with.
>Some simply do not elect to take a "chance" with that kind of money, and
>there are certainly "no quarantees", no matter where they have been
>going.....and again if they choose to spend their money on something
>else that is also their right, and they should not be condemned for
>that!
>
>I have also seen allot of deception about several doctors over the
>years, not just the one in question now.
>I have seen allot of people who also had their pain return or never go
>away when going to the prefered doctors in the past, however it was kept
>quiet and if anyone "did" admit it they were bashed either on the board
>or in emails.
>This is "help"????
>
>If you look back in the archives you will see what I mean, especially
>2000 and 2001.
>This was "no different" than what is going on now, just a different
>doctor!
>I in no way mean to say any of the doctors are bad doctors but they are
>also not Gods, and shouldn't be made out to be such.
>Adhesions are a real problem and have a mind of their own, no matter how
>good the doctor is.
>
>Until people start being compassionate to "everyone" no matter what they
>do or where they choose to go, and people start telling the truth
>whether it be good or bad, nothing will ever improve on this board or
>any of them for that matter.
>I am an individual with rights and I am not a follower.
>I make up my own mind and when people get pushy with me a red flag goes
>up and it should for everyone.
>I have found in my life if it's too good to be true it usually is!
>
>Please don't base your decisions on just one or two people's good or bad
>outcome, because you could be very disappointed in the end, as many have
>been.
>I disagree with giving people false hope and unreal expectations.
>You must research on your own and be your own advocate.
>You must read between the lines and not jump to conclusions as well.
>If I had not done that I probably would be bankrupt by now and still in
>the same pain... and yes I am in "allot" of pain every minute and have
>very real and many problems in addition to adhesions. I deal with it on
>my own the best I can.
>I can understand desperation but am so glad I did not allow myself to be
>pushed into things when most vulnerable a few years ago, only to see
>allot of people still in pain "and" broke to boot later on!
>
>I have been on several other medical support groups but none of them are
>pushy about specific doctors as they are and always have been on this
>board.
>I have never understood why people would lie about things because I am a
>very honest person (sometimes to a fault), and the lies and deception
>have always really bothered me.
>I "know" people do this and hide the facts, and there is no reason for
>this kind of behavior from adults.
>
>"Many" people boast of their miracle cures, and I have no problem with
>that but they never post when and if their pain returns. Directly after
>a surgery does not tell you much at all because adhesions can start
>giving you problems again years after surgery which has always been the
>case with me.
>Yes, I also like to hear the immediate results but even more-so the
>long-term to base a "true" evaluation.
>
>Why is everyone so afraid to speak the truth on this site? What in the
>world is there to hide, and from who??
>Some just disappear in shame for still having pain, others keep it a
>"secret" so no-one gets mad at them, and you don't know the truth until
>they are heading for another surgery (if you are even made aware then).
>It has been said on the board people disappear because they are
>pain-free and enjoying life, which may be the case for some, but I also
>know it is not the truth for many others.
>You must keep your eyes and ears open for the contradictions and
>hypocrits.
>
>We all have enough dealing with our pain and problems and problems with
>doctors not believing us, we don't need that from our support buddies as
>well.
>If I am condemned for this so be it, someone has to open the eyes on
>this board and genuinely care about people!
>
>I will try to help anyone I can and give un-biased support.
>I am not on the internet to fight, just trying to make people see the
>light!
>I am "not" in any clique and have my own mind.
>I would just like to get along with everyone if possible, which I know
>is unrealistic.
>
>JEAN
>
>--
>Jean (from PA)
>

Enter keywords:
Returns per screen: Require all keywords: