Reading emails like yours just make me cry. As it is like no matter what you do another wall knocks you in the face and I know and hate that feeling so much! Felling this feeling beginning with my horrible abusive childhood. Where I would often cry myself to sleep at night as early as I can remember, holding back the tears so no one would hear me would cause my throat to feel as if it was being pulled in a thousand directions. I still remember and can feel it too this day. My pillow would get saturated by the tears I would cry and I would pray to God that he just take my life, that I would never wake up again. I even remember once telling my mother I wanted to die when I was 8 and she had thrown a box of tablets at me daring me to take them. A total psychopath. I actually have written medical records for anyone that would like to read them, where the doctors write how by body is covered in scares, that I beg them to not make me go home, that my mother threw me against brick walls causing epilepsy, lock me in dark rooms at two for weeks at a time ect. So I truly can relate to the desperation one has when no light seems to be in sight and all there seems to be is one big black dark hole. But when I look back and remember how I felt and how the pain would never end. It did end, as a wonderful women who witnessed the abuse rescued me and experienced death threats in the process, I was 13. I then too would battle with this sickness, my friends keep saying hasn't God allowed enough crap to happen in your life already! But it is not because we are bad or have done something wrong, or by doing something different, we only have too look around the world and see how being simply born in the wrong place can cause a life of starvation and disease, and they did nothing wrong except be born. I wonder if they have anything scientifically where they can transplant intestines, as you need a working one? Now I am intrigued to research this, I do know they are working on taking stem cells to rebuild body parts, they have done this with muscle and aorta's ect. I still feel sick and just launched an internet start-up http://www.cluehut.com. Some days I can't even comprehend the workload and responsibility, but I promise one thing if this company becomes successful I will become a major contributor, educator for this disease so as to stop this suffering once and for all. I remember how Karen in her desperation to find a cure for Melissa, she would pray constantly for more than 13 years and in the last year she said in a prayer, God if you fix Melissa I promise I will do everything in my power to educate the world about adhesions. And she has kept her promise, if she hadn't gone through what she did, we would not have what she has given, this is where suffering serves a purpose, but My God is it one hell of a valley of death to walk through too get there. Genyfer
Fri, 20 Nov 2009, Stacey wrote:
>
>Hi all I haven't been on the board in a while. I have been really
>emotional the last couple of months and just a mess. It has been almost
>2 years now since my colon has actually worked and I think I would go
>forever without a BM if I did not give myself major ememas. My last
>surgery was 3 years ago with Dr. Redan for adhesions, which he did take
>out, but he warned me he thought the nerves and muscles in my abdomen
>had been cut on so many times and that I have taken so many laxatives
>over my lifetime that it had damaged my colon. Things went well for
>about a year after the surgery, but then my colon stopped working again.
>I have had 8 open abdmominal surgeries all together for female problems,
>hysterectomy, removal of ovaries and adhesions.
>
>I am now scheduled for a subtotal colectomy with Dr. Redan as well as
>removal of adhesions on 12/16/09. Dr. Redan states I have slow transit
>constipation and my colon just isn't working anymore. Has anyone else
>had this procedure done? If you have could you please write me and let
>me know how your procedure went and what I should expect? I am very
>nervous, but I know I must do something to make myself better because
>this is making me sick, I feel like I am being poisoned. Thanks
>everyone.
>
>--
>Stacey