Chronic pain not only affects the person in pain...but also their spouse, family and friends...( Part 1 )

From: Helen Dynda (olddad66@runestone.net)
Thu Apr 20 23:38:27 2000


This information is based on my personal experience as a result of having lived with the chronic pain of postsurgical adhesions as a result of a laparotomy...more than 30 years ago!!

There is no question that every victim of adhesions experiences stress...and...as a result:

1.) * We feel more pain.

2.) * Our families and relationships are affected.

3.) * Our lives become more difficult. The list goes on and on....

Chronic pain not only affects the person in pain...but also their spouse, family and friends. The articles, which are listed in PART 2, may be helpful to not only you but also to your spouse, family and friends as you try to cope.

Endometriosis is mentioned in some of those articles; but all of us, who post messages on the International Adhesions Society Message Board, are very aware that endometriosis and adhesions have alot in common. So when endometriosis is mentioned, we can easily adapt that information to our problem with adhesions because.....

1.) Both adhesions and endometriosis cause their victims chronic, debilitating pain!!!

2.) NONE of the following diagnostic tests will diagnose adhesions or endometriosis: blood tests, X-rays, Ultrasounds, CT-scans, MRIs, etc. The ONLY way in which adhesions and endometriosis can be diagnosed is by diagnostic laparoscopy, which is a surgical procedure.

3.) Many doctors DO NOT understand and DO NOT acknowledge that both adhesions and endometriosis can cause chronic pain for their victims. As a result these doctors tend to treat us as if our pain is psychological...that our pain is not real...that it is " all in our heads!!"

4.) Some doctors agree that both adhesions and endometriosis can cause chronic pain; but then we are told that we " have to learn how to live with our pain "...that there is nothing more that can be done...unless we are experiencing a severe bowel obstruction!!

5.) As a result of the difficulties we have had in trying to get a helpful and accurate diagnosis, eventually we sense that our families no longer believe us. We are well aware of how difficult it has been for our families...and we feel so helpless and don't know what we can do about it.

6.) Eventually we begin to sense that our friends are abandoning us. We begin to feel so all alone...and helpless to do anything about it.

7.) We no longer know what to do!! We begin to feel trapped!! We have exhausted all avenues of HOPE!!!

8.) Then one day we learn that there are surgeons who specialize in trying to help people who have difficult surgical problems as a result of adhesions and/or endometriosis.

But then we learn that we have to travel great distances in order to receive this specialized surgical care. We learn how costly this surgery can be; and we learn that our health insurance will not be there to help us.

We also learn that, even with the very best surgical help and the use of of an adhesion barrier, there are no guarantees!!!

9.) Since it is apparent that we cannot afford specialized surgical help, there is only one thing left for us to do: to seek pain relief with the assistance of a pain management program at a pain clinic...a topic which is too lengthy to post at this time.


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