BUT, first I would like to share the following with all of you:
I received an email from a pediatrician in which he told me that his mother was suffering from adhesions; and he asked me to send him information about adhesions. Among the information which I sent to him, I included the list ( below ) of "What Some Doctors Say, And What They May Be Really Thinking." Needless to say, he was not too happy about receiving the following list; and chastised me for sending this list to him!!
I know that there are MANY excellent doctors/surgeons throughout the USA...as well as throughout the world!! BUT the following items are NOT intended to reflect on them...BUT are for the many doctors/surgeons, who have said one thing...and really meant another thing at the expense of their patients!!!
[]]]] WHAT "SOME" DOCTORS SAY, AND WHAT THEY MAY BE REALLY THINKING:
1.) "This should be taken care of right away."
( I'd planned a trip to Hawaii next month; but this is so easy and profitable that I want to fix it before it cures itself. )
~ ~ ~ ~
2.) "There's alot of that going around."
( That's the third one this week. I'd better learn something about this. )
~ ~ ~ ~
3.) "Well, what have we here...?"
( He has no idea and is hoping you'll give him a clue. )
~ ~ ~ ~
4.) "Let me check your medical history."
( I want to see if you've paid your last bill before spending any more time with you. )
~ ~ ~ ~
5.) "Why don't we make another appointment later in the week."
( I'm playing golf this afternoon, and this a waste of time --OR -- I need the bucks, so I'm charging you for another office visit. )
~ ~ ~ ~
6.) "We have some good news and some bad news."
( The good news is, I'm going to buy that new BMW. The bad news is, you're going to pay for it. )
~ ~ ~ ~
7.) "Let's see how it develops."
( Maybe in a few days it will grow into something that can be cured. )
~ ~ ~ ~
8.) "Let me schedule you for some tests."
( I have a forty percent interest in the lab. )
~ ~ ~ ~
9.) "I'd like to have my associate look at you."
( He's going through a messy divorce and owes me a bundle. )
~ ~ ~ ~
10.) "I'd like to prescribe a new drug."
( I'm writing a paper and would like to use you for a guinea pig. )
~ ~ ~ ~
11.) "If it doesn't clear up in a week, give me a call."
( I don't know what it is. Maybe it will go away by itself. )
~ ~ ~ ~
12.) "That's quite a nasty looking wound."
( I think I'm going to throw up. )
~ ~ ~ ~
13.) "This may smart a little."
( Last week two patients bit off their tongues. )
~ ~ ~ ~
14.) "Well, we're not feeling so well today, are we...?"
( I'm stalling for time. Who are you and why are you here? )
~ ~ ~ ~
15.) "This should fix you up."
( The drug company slipped me some big bucks to prescribe this stuff. )
~ ~ ~ ~
16.) "Everything seems to be normal."
( Rats! I guess I can't buy that new beach condo after all. )
~ ~ ~ ~
17.) "I'd like to run some more tests."
( I can't figure out what's wrong. Maybe the kid in the lab can solve this one. )
~ ~ ~ ~
18.) "Do you suppose all this stress could be affecting your nerves?"
( You're crazier'n an outhouse rat. Now, if I can only find a shrink who'll split fees with me ... )
~ ~ ~ ~
19.) "If those symptoms persist, call for an appointment."
( I've never heard of anything so disgusting. Thank goodness I'm off next week. )
~ ~ ~ ~