Re: What is happening to the messages on this forum

From: Millie (milliem@citlink.net)
Sat Mar 3 19:56:08 2001


I noticed the same thing. A few nights ago, I had doubles of everything. That never happened before, either. Millie

>----- Original Message -----
From: "kl Findlay" <klfindlay@yahoo.co.uk> To: "Multiple recipients of list ADHESIONS" <adhesions@mail.medispecialty.com> Sent: Saturday, March 03, 2001 9:25 PM Subject: What is happening to the messages on this forum

> I have a lot of emails to get through and find it flustraighting to read
the > subject title which said [ Re: Uploading Photos to Quilt] I thought I
might > be able to offer help with this subject but this is what I got on opening
> the post. I think there are 7 or 8 posts here. Its difficult to tell.
> Does anyone know why this is happening? It is a lot to read through to
find > the letter at the bottom is the subject and you have already read it
several > times before. I believe I am not the only person to complain about this.
Is > there anyway that we can fix this problem please?
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: adhesions@adhesions.org [mailto:adhesions@adhesions.org]On Behalf
> Of Mary Wade
> Sent: 03 March 2001 21:37
> To: Multiple recipients of list ADHESIONS
> Subject: RE: Uploading Photos to Quilt
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Millie [SMTP:milliem@citlink.net]
> Sent: Saturday, March 03, 2001 3:10 PM
> To: Multiple recipients of list ADHESIONS
> Subject: Re: Uploading Photos to Quilt
>
> Dear Mary,
> Yes, every bit of what you say makes sense to me. I went to that ob/gyn
> yesterday. I told her I've been worse since the surgery. I asked her if
she > could have some tests run, such as a CAT scan, or as much as I hate
> them,those barium tests, as I have steady pain, and uno urge to go. I told
> her the last decent bm I had was around Feb.3. SHe insisted I look much
> better since the surgery. I told her looks are very deceiving. I asked her
> whow the pathology looked, and she said it only showed a few tiny
fibroids. > She now says I had moderate adhesions. I didn't get mad at her, but I had
a > list of questions that I needed answered. I asked her if she ever heard
> tell
> of adhesiolysis. She said that was an old treatment. Was it?
>
> It's been done...I guess for ages. Mostly unsuccessfully. That's why
docs > run from it. They want to "do no harm" as they are bound by oath to do.
> Those of us who have gone to PA have gone there because the surgeons
there > use techniques that have been practiced and finely honed, compared to the
> average adhesiolysis. They do it differently than most. So the
techniques > are new...adhesiolysis isn't
>
> I thought it
> may be fairly new. She said it doesn't work for everyone. She said I could
> try it. Now she says I should try pain management. I said I would.
>
> I went for pain management and found it to be helpful. I had a really
nice > doc and I worked hard to implement those things that he taught me. This
> sounds like a very reasonable next step to me. I know that others on the
> board have not been so thrilled by the pain docs, but I had a good
> experience.
>
> She said
> she removed all of it because I cried that I had a lot of pelvic pain. I
> told her I have much more pain since the TAH. She still insists I look
much > better since. I may as well talk to the wall. I get such pains behind the
> navel, and it's harder to pass gas.
>
> Pain doctors are MD's. If they have any suspicions that you have a
problem > that threatens your long-term health/life, that doc will refer you for
> tests. Tell the pain doc all the gut details. The docs need all the
> information.
>
> Mary, I'm so scared that I don't know what to do. I did sign up for pain
> management. I didn't tell her I met Dr. Redan.
>
> Millie....I know that it's been tough with this doc....but it's in your
> best interest to put everything out there on the table for all the docs to
> see. Had she known that you were so desperate that you struck out on your
> own to find someone, that would have perhaps sent a message that your
words > don't with her. How would you feel about writing down your history and
> concerns to send to the pain doc? Something about sitting down by
yourself > at a keyboard....is much less threatening than the one-to-one convo with
> the doctor. Even if you don't send it, it solidifies in your mind what
the > important parts are. It keeps you focused and truthful. It's a good
> "mirror" to look at yourself and to double check yourself. It helps you
> set goals as you go to the pain clinic.
> Difficult when you feel so badly, though.
>
> But when I mentioned
> adhesiolysis, she said I could try it, but it doesn't work for everyone.
As > far as the grief cycle I am somewhere between denial and anger, but with a
> hair of acceptance thrown in.
>
> Denial! That's MY personal favorite stage! It does help me to keep those
> stages in mind...so that I can compare my behaviors to them and try to
work > to not get "stuck." Does it work if I say, "I am at the stage of
accepting > that I live in the stage of denial?" I do feel so much better...it's just
> hard to acknowledge that I'm not 100% better. Soon...maybe this week, I
am > going to physical therapy to try to get myself more mobile. It's just
> tricky to do it without feeling worse.
>
> I saved and even printed up that paper you are talking about. My husband
> went in with me, but didn't say a word.
> Thanks for answering me.
> I am still waiting for my medical records to be copied and released to
me. > Millie

>> ----- Original Message -----
> From: "Karla" <ifirgit@new.rr.com>
> To: "Multiple recipients of list ADHESIONS"
> <adhesions@mail.medispecialty.com>
> Sent: Saturday, March 03, 2001 9:31 AM
> Subject: Re: Uploading Photos to Quilt
>
> > Millie,
> >
> > I totally agree with Mary and I guess I am guilty of not explaining
> myself
>
> > more clearly. When we go into the doctor's office ready to do battle we
> > will often times come out empty handed if it is not handled correctly.
> >
> > We cannot go in with all our weapons drawn so to speak. What I try and
> do
> > now...and it has taken me a long time to get to where I can even
question > > the doctor...is sit and hear what he has to say. When it appears that
he > is
> > going to do nothing...or is going to do something we don't like...that
is > > when I start asking questions. We can't enter their offices already on
> the
> > attack because they will automatically put up every wall possible. Once
> > they have done what they are going to do I start asking my own questions
> and
> > making my own demands....but I don't come across as being demanding
> because
> > I don't do it in an attacking fashion. When I last dealt with not
> getting
> > the appropriate pain medicine I told them that the medicine was just not
> > working....I heard what they had to say...then I told them very nicely
> that
> > I was aware of patient's rights and my right to receive adequate pain
> > relief. That has worked every single time. But as Mary has stated, I
> think
> > it only works because I am not attacking the doctor.
> >
> > Karla

>> > ----- Original Message -----
> > From: "Mary Wade" <acbcsrt@kansas.net>
> > To: "Multiple recipients of list ADHESIONS"
> > <adhesions@mail.medispecialty.com>
> > Sent: Saturday, March 03, 2001 7:51 AM
> > Subject: RE: Uploading Photos to Quilt
> >
> > > Dear Millie, First I want to apologize for not getting back to you
> before
> > > you went to the doctor. I am usually gone for part of each work week
> and
> > > do not get on the computer to answer emails.
> > >
> > > I don't know that I have much to add at this point to that
> > "Coulda/Shoulda"
> > > paper that I sent you earlier. I wrote most of what I know as
> "workable"
> > > in that paper. I'd love for others to edit it and add suggestions to
> that
> > > piece. I was going to attach it now but see that I don't have it on
> this
> > > computer. Ask if you want it. It's in the archives somewhere, too.
> > >
> > > Often, I don't think it's so much WHAT we say....as what our body
> language
> > > is saying to them. In my work as an audiologist in an medical office,
> I
> > > see patients all day long. Over the years, we learn to "read" all the
> > > unspoken messages as well as the spoken ones. Someone comes in ready
> to
> > > beat me over the head? Do I pick up on that immediately? You bet.
> What
> > > is the normal human reaction to that? Defensive position.
> > >
> > > If you want your health care provider to HELP you....don't put them in
> > that
> > > defensive position because immediately you are off to a bad start.
> They
> > > are highly trained, yes....but they are HUMAN. And so are we
patients. > > > Part of the human condition is one of "no guarantees" except that of
> > > eventual physical death. My life was not given with a "pain-free
> > > guarantee" stamped on my butt. The Serenity Prayer....which I can't
> > > quote....(maybe someone else can post it)....is a good summary of the
> > > attitude I have had to hang on to over the years.
> > >
> > > Now comes the hard part. The first step is figure out what to do with
> > your
> > > animosity. If you need to talk to a professional counselor-type to
> work
> > > through some of this, just go do it. Can't hurt....might help. The
> > mental
> > > stress of keeping that going does not help with the pain....it only
> makes
> > > it worse. I am not smart at telling other people how to do this. I
> just
> > > know that we have to realize that when we experience a tragic loss of
> any
> > > kind...that we will go through a grief cycle. The stages of that
cycle > > > are: 1) denial, 2) anger, 3) bargaining, 4) acceptance. The
acceptance > > > stage frees us up to get on with our lives, but we have to deal with
> each
> > > of those other steps first. And just because we get to the acceptance
> > > level at one point in time....doesnt' mean that we don't have to trek
> back
> > > through that cycle at a later date.
> > >
> > > In the sorts of encounters that we chronic-pain ppl have with doctors,
> we
> > > have to know going into the consultation that we do with our
egos...and > > how
> > > the docs handle their egos....makes a big difference in how much
> progress
> > > will be made. You get two egos battling and the stuff for which you
> are
> > > seeking attention ends up on the floor. And by "ego," I am not using
> the
> > > word as it's commonly used. By "ego" I mean the absolute
unwillingness > to
> > > let go of the "me-me-me-ness" for a bit....to just sit there and try
to > > > "be" that other person. It's not so hard to do this. Practice at
home > > > with your family. When/if we can drop the ego-dance in our trickiest
> of
> > > our human interactions, it's amazing how open, honest, and caring the
> > other
> > > person can be. We have to be willing to REALLY hear what our docs are
> > > saying. When a doc says, "I can't help you now.".....that means, "I
> don't
> > > have anything to offer you right now." We may not LIKE that
idea...but > > the
> > > doc is telling the truth as he/she knows it. If that is what the doc
> > says,
> > > then the ONLY course of action with that doc is to ask, "Where can you
> > send
> > > me to get me some help. Give me your very best advice and what you
see > as
> > > the options." (Just curious...what did your ob/gyn say about you
going > to
> > > see Dr. Redan?) I always like to throw in....while looking deeply
into > > > their eyes, "Let's say that I am your most beloved
> > > mother/daugher/sister/wife.....what now do you advise?"
> > >
> > > Does any of this make any sense? It's very difficult to describe in
> words
> > > "what works for me" when talking about attitude. Please keep in mind
> this
> > > is my style.....others here have other styles of communication that
> work
> > > well also. I can only speak to what I know....or as my friend says,
"I > > can
> > > do no better than to walk in the light that I have." (Did THAT just
> sound
> > > like a disclaimer??? LOL at me!) OK...outta here...
> > >
> > > In friendship, Mary
> > >
> > > Original Message-----
> > > From: Millie [SMTP:milliem@citlink.net]
> > > Sent: Thursday, March 01, 2001 2:40 PM
> > > To: Multiple recipients of list ADHESIONS
> > > Subject: Re: Uploading Photos to Quilt
> > >
> > > Dear Mary,
> > > How are you? I have an extremely important question for you. Tomorrow
I > go
> > > back to that ob/gyn who did my TAH and cut adhesions. How shold I talk
> to
> > > her? I feel I have a lot of questions that I want answered, some of
> which
> > > she won't like, I'm sure.
> > > Mary, How do I get her to take me seriously about the bowel problems
> and
> > > the
> > > pain? Also, How do I let her know how miserable I am, and how serious
I > am
> > > about these issues? I'm no better after a month.
> > > Thanks so much for your help.
> > > Millie

>> > > ----- Original Message -----
> > > From: "Mary Wade" <acbcsrt@kansas.net>
> > > To: "Multiple recipients of list ADHESIONS"
> > > <adhesions@mail.medispecialty.com>
> > > Sent: Wednesday, February 28, 2001 11:07 PM
> > > Subject: Re: Uploading Photos to Quilt
> > >
> > > > OK...stupid question here. If we all have photos on the quilt, when
> we
> > > > click on the master list of the quilt, will it take forever to load?
> Or
> > > > just slower loading when we click on an individual name? I was
> thinking
> > > > that if the whole quilt loads much slower because of the pictures,
it > > > might
> > > > be discouraging for someone just breezing through. BUT, I DO want
to > > see
> > > > all your darlin mugs....so I might be just fine with letting the ppl
> > > > breezing through be discouraged at slow loading times :))))) I just
> > > clicked
> > > > on Kathy Lindley's quilt block..and it is really striking to see the
> > face
> > > > behind the words. Seems....different somehow. Hits me harder.
Cold > in
> > > > Kansas, Mary
> > > >
> > > > At 09:54 PM 2/28/01 -0600, you wrote:
> > > > >I just tried to upload my Photo and it didn't work!
> > > > >I am very well acquainted with doing this and I tried 2 different
> > > > >formats and it rejected both.
> > > > >I sent an email to the administrator asking why.
> > > > >I will let you know.
> > > > >JEAN (from PA)
> > > > >
> > > > >--
> > > > >Jean (from PA)
> > > > >
> > > > > to the unsubscribe form at
> > http://www.adhesions.org/forums/listcmds.htm
> > > > >
> > > >
> > > > to the unsubscribe form at
> http://www.adhesions.org/forums/listcmds.htm
> > >
> > > to the unsubscribe form at
> http://www.adhesions.org/forums/listcmds.htm
> > >
> > > to the unsubscribe form at
> http://www.adhesions.org/forums/listcmds.htm
> >
>


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