I am sorry that you missed celebrating your sons birthday, I too had to stay home while everyone else attended a family celebration. It is a horrible feeling.
Jackie, I have found writing very theraputic, it is a great way to let out your feelings, sometimes the right place to do it is here. Sometimes some of the feelings we express here, should also be heard by our families. I have 3 teenage daughters, I have given each of them a beautifully bound journal (an excersis book with a cute covering would be fine). In that journal I encourage my daughters to write down messages to themselves and other members of the family.
When there is an entry addressed to a member of the household, the journal is left on that persons bed. When the recipient has read the entry, they respond. Ithas been a wonderful experience in our house. Teenagers are very emotional and scream, yell, loose their temper (just like there parents *grin*) this is a way for them to apologise in their own time, or just express love, dissapointment or what ever. Sometimes we write down special memories, things we have done that bring a smile to our faces. I know that some boys and even some girls might not like this idea, but it doesn't hurt to try.
Jackie, why don't you make a journal for yourself, and write about your feelings, how proud you are of your son....how much you love & appreciate your husband, sorry that you missed the celebration, the joy of seeing him do well at school.....whatever it is that makes you ptoud & love your family.
When you are ready, you could leave the journal on someones bed for them to read......
Just a thought Jackie, I hope it helps. You are in my thoughts and prayers, don't give up.
Love, hugs & cheers, Jo (Wally)