I have had alot of stress lately & very distressful news. My Dad past
away Sept 1st. and since then it has been one bad thing after another.
I have had constant flare ups with my side where I have scar tissue &
adhesions. The physical pain as well as the emotional pain has been
more then I can handle.
I live in Guelph, Ontario & had to drive to Florida for my dad's
funeral. That alone escalated my pain. I ended up taking extra of my
perscribed medication. I don't know what to do. I barely manage the
pain on my regular dose, but when I get flare ups they get really bad.
I'm suppose to see my doctor this week to get my perscription renewed. I
know he will give me a hard time because I took more then what I was
suppose to. But everytime there is stress in my life I end up getting
major flare ups. And what I have a hard time handling is, that my
doctor & other doctors that I have seen, always minimize my pain, and
make me feel like nothing. In a way I feel like I have been raped. I
know that might sound silly, but I've been poked and prodded. I've been
made to feel humilated and ashamed by nurses & doctors. And there are
many times I feel like it is my fault I have chronic pain. They treat
me and the pain like it is nothing. The pain is real and I am a human
being. Doctors and nurses are supposedly there to help poeple, yet I
leave the hospital or the doctors office feeling worse then when I first
came in. I dread everytime I have to go to a hospital or doctors
office. There are other reasons I get flare ups, but that is one of the
causes for major pain. I can't exactly time when I will get flare ups
either, and my doctor dosen't seem to understand that. I can't go back
and undo all the surgeries I've had, which is the reason for my chronic
pain today. The last several years have been hard enough with the
chronic pain, but the last couple of weeks have been the worst yet.
There are some days I can barely get out of bed. My two sons try to
help & my husband, but I hate them seeing me in pain all the time.
I wrote this because I needed to vent some of my depression, anger,
pain. I have read many of your stories and can relate to many of what
you all have been going through regarding doctors, pain, medication
etc...
I thank all of you for writing your stories, because when all is said
and done it helps me know what to do in certain situations, and helps me
cope with the physical & emotional pain, in knowing I am not alone. It
also reassures me that my pain is real. Who better then ourselves to
judge the degree of pain we are going through, after all we live in our
bodies everyday...
I guess to I am tired of being a victim, because that is how I have been
made to feel like. I have read that a few people have been writing to
the Montel Williams Show. I would also like to show my support and give
a helping hand by writing to him. If anyone could possibly give me more
information & direct me in the right way I would
appreciate it.
I would like to thank all those who took the time to read my message.
And to once again thank all the people who took the time to write their
stories, to help people like me.