Re: How do you get your family to understand???

From: Jo Eslick (joanne@bombobeach.com)
Sat Oct 5 21:20:44 2002


Sarah,

You have asked a very good question, and one that many of us have had to deal with in one way or another. I have addressed this issue on The Australian Adhesions Society web site http://www.bombobeach.com because I discovered very early, without parental or life partners and our own children’s support - living and coping with adhesions and chronic pain is impossible.

We become angry, frustrated, and short tempered and mistrusting of everyone. The most important thing is to sit down with your mother for example and talk to her in a calm and relaxed way.

Explain the pain - it twists, pulls, burns, causes pins and needles, it's hot, sharp, a deep ache.... and so on. Explain how it feels and how much it makes you feel exhausted and tired "to the bone" and how you have discovered you have a low tolerance now with people... mainly because your body is under so much distress it simply isn't coping.

It's not information about adhesions you need to relate to your mother - it's feelings and how it is affecting your relationship with her and other members of the family.

Please come and visit bombo.... not all of the information available there is about mother daughter relationships, BUT most of it could be applied with a little for thought. Look at Intimacy... because in that section I do talk about how a partner might be feeling about his spouse's pain.... and it talks about some of his behaviours and why they occur. There is also a section on Journals, and this very effective communication tool is the way I keep things under control with my own daughters.

There are also letters written by the grown up daughter of an adhesions sufferer and their is also a letter from my eldest daughter who has also been diagnosed with endometriosis and she is just seventeen.

Sarah.... it's all about feelings. If you have any questions or would like more specific advice you are welcome to write to me personally at joanne@bombobeach.com

Love & warm gentle hugs, Jo

--
Joanne Eslick
Founder Australian Adhesions Support Group
http://www.bombobeach.com
NSW Australian Co-ordinator of
International Adhesions Society
http://www.adhesions.org

--
I am not a medical person, and all my messages are based
on personal experience.  I am a fellow adhesions sufferer
reaching out to help others.

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