Re: relationships

From: Karen Kaplan (
Tue Feb 15 07:07:30 2000

Tara: This request opens a can of worms. I have withdrawn from so many relationships that I feel like a hermit sometimes. After finding out my uterus was completely adhered to my colon in 1988 and that I wouldn't be able to carry a pregnancy to term, I withdrew from any man who might consider marriage. My birth family never even acknoweldged my health problems and, after my dad died in 92, my only sister stopped talking to me when she found out there was money. She physically assaulted me the next time I saw her. My mother expected me to quit my job and move back to Fla to take care of her like my dad had, without ever acknowledging the problems I was having which made it hard to even take care of myself. She died in 97 before I could pull it together to be with her. Fortunately, sex does not hurt, so I have found a gentleman whose passion for me is one of the very few things that still brings a smile to my face. I try to think of him whenever all these bad thoughts and broken relationships really bring me down. And, as they are reminding me that breakfast is late, I have two cats who love me. Bosco and Homer say hi to all. Being so alone makes it harder. Be glad your husband still loves you enough to be a brother to you. Best, KAren

>----- Original Message -----
From: Sherman <> To: Multiple recipients of list ADHESIONS <> Sent: Tuesday, February 15, 2000 7:41 AM Subject: relationships

> For some reason, this question seems more personal to me than all the
> physical details we've shared, which makes it difficult to ask. My
> question is whether or not any of you have had a personal relationships
> fall apart due to your medical problems? Or if not due to them, then
> during them?
> My husband and I have been through alot together, and I love him very
> much, but as a brother. It has always been that way, even before my body
> started falling apart. We decided on a (very friendly) divorce even
> before this latest medical crisis, but this has been part of what has
> kept the divorce from happening. Basically, I am not eligible for health
> insurance at my job, so I am on his insurance. So, I can't afford it.
> Between that and the fact that he is still in love with me, it's made
> for an extremely awkward situation all around. It can't be helping the
> medical problems.
> I was just curious as to how ya'll may be handling any
> relationship-related problems.
> Tara

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