Good Morning Everyone,
I have not wrote in a long time, but I read the board daily. Here is
alittle about myself. I have had a hyst. and both ovaries and 2 more
surgeries for ovarian remnant, and I still have ovarian remnant.I not
sure if anyone will understand me but if anyone can it will be
you.Yesterday I called my doctor about refilling my pain medication
(morphine 60mg)and last night she finally called me back and gave me the
refill without any problems and gave me something for the break though
pain. After getting off the phone I got really upset over the pain
medication, I feel ashame that I need these pill to help me with my
daily life. I stopped them for a week before and had no problems with
withdraws(that good). but the pain was horrible, I have been on
morphine for about 1 1/2 years. I have fought for almost 3 years for
pain control and that is why I tried surgery. I had my last surgery
May8,2001, and after that surgery my bowels would not wake up and was on
a liquid diet for alittle over a month. I have been working for almost
a year now, and life has become alot less painful with the medication,
but I still feel like I am a druggie, whenever I go the hospital for
something thay always ask about my medication and when they hear
morphine the doctors always tell me how the medcation is not good for me
and how I need to find a different way of dealing with the pain. My
friends are understanding to how I feel but they do not understand what
life is like without the medication. I have problems with sleep because
the pain is so bad I can not walk up my stairs at homeI can not stand or
sit to long. I have been working a year now and I finally felt like I
was a normal person but for some reason I just do not seem to be able to
say I am on pain medication to anyone, but I told my boss about the
problems I have and the medication I am on and she has been really good.
I know in my heart that there is nothing to be embrassed about, but why
do I feel like I have to hide the fact that I take this medication.
Thanks for listening to me, ans sorry this message is alittle long.